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In 2004 the American people reelected George W. Bush on the slogan “he kept us safe”. I’m not an idiot and I remember things that happened three years ago and who our president was at the time. I wasn’t an idiot in November of 2004 either as I remembered the twin towers falling in a cloud of smoke and rubble and who was supposed to be our commander-in-chief at the time. I was super fucking pissed that election night and I stayed that way for years. I bought guns and booze and dropped out of college and said, “fuck it dude” all the time. The whole debacle and my fellow Missourians voting the way they did totally fucked me up in a negative way. I gave up on people and I’ve never really gotten over it.

Now there’s this Trump shit! What the hell Missouri with your constitutional conservatives and your freedom of religion anti-gay racist legislative fascism! I’m supposed to be trying not to be racist against white people anymore, but the way rural Missouri politics is going it’s making it hard.

Please stop being horrible and disappointing me. I don’t need to be in a panic and wondering what country I need to move to.

Only slightly exaggerated.

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